Torn into pieces

Oh how I wish he knows.

How I wish he would understands.

Maybe this is the part when my sister said "Naah, you are just having one of those moments when you felt like you eager to do something and end up meaningless few days later"

But I think it is a great transformation.

And I don't think I have the courage to do so.

I am torn into pieces. I don't know which road to take.

What should I do nonetheless.

Mampukah?

Bila la aku nak keje nie ye? Tiap kali nak keluar menoreh, ujan lebat.

Keputusan permohonan UiTM belum dapat semak lagi. nebEss jugak.

Bila dah confirm keputusan tu, bole la decide wether keje tetap or sambung blaja.

So far hidup aku bosan!

Duit pun takde.

Aku nak beli enset baru, dah lame sangat kot aku pinjam En.Nestum nye fon.

Enset dulu 2x kene curik. Sony Ericson ngan Nokia C6.

Urggh! The losts. I miss my phones.

Aku arap dapat keje bulan depan. Please stop raining. T__T

.:. It has to be told .:.

Well, I can;t believe I'm going to say this

But do you recognise this?



YES.

I have a Twitter account.


After few years critisizing the potential and irritation of Twitter, I finnaly made an account.
Yea yea, I'm ***** yadayadayada~

I was tempted by the curiosity of my own. Can't blame it tho.
Follow me on Twitter, ekahAsri. :)

.:. Not that it is not Important .:.

Well, I just want to say that I didn't get the TESL. Bummerrr. Yeah.
I am still unemployed. suupperrb. Yea~
I am actually envy every blogger that has awesome blog. (HUH?)
Okay, I am annoyed with my life. Fine~

I don't know if I'm too bored from doing nothing for the past few months, (jobless) or maybe I was just occupied with messiness in my head that was making me being like this. AWFUL~

I hate everything I see, read, smell or touch. Urgh! Maybe this is IT, one of the moments that people are having breakdown in life. I guess.

Or maybe I hate life because I couldn't do anything after knowing that I have slipped the only opportunity to keep doing what I love. English, studying the twists, the precious unheard words, the sentences that can make me have a goosebumps. The only subject that I love in life, the only things that I actually enjoy doing, writing short stories, open my notebook and write some ridiculuos poems. And now, knowing that I CAN'T learn more and deeply on it, it is DEVASTATING.

I hate my blog, by looking at it, I felt naseous, whats with the polca dot anyways? IDIOT. Its not cool at all.

p/s : I hate my life.

.Harapan & Kerja Sambilan. :)

UiTM da apply, so tunggu je keputusan nye, mitak-mitak ade rezeki untuk sambung blaja. Pastu taun dopan apply lagih ngan UPU, InsyaAllah dapat. Mood study blom abes lagih neh. Kursus-kursus yang aku pilih tu sume da ikowt kelayakan aku, kalo xdapat nak wat caner. Meanwhile, aku g job hunting with my bestfriend. Ade jugak aku pegi temuduga untuk keje tetap tapi tak diizinkan oleyh ayah aku. Die cakap kalo nak sambung blaja, keje part time je duluh, xyah nak keje2 serious sgt. Kalo xnak keje, dok je kat umah. So, macam ler aku neh suke dok terperuk kat umah mcm anak dara mithali kan? wahaha. Aku kua ler carik keje part time kat bandar KB.

Lam puluh2 jugak la jawatan kosong yang ade tapi ade yang ayah aku tak berkenan, bile ayah aku izin mama BFF aku plak yg tak berkenan. Last2 keje kat satu kedai neh, agak lebat gak ler gaji nye. Kalo keje lame, dapat elaun lagih. ahaks. InsyaAllah aku start keje arinih. Agak baik prihatin member aku sorang neh, SMS aku pepagi buta untuk ucap "Selamat Bekerja". HAHA. Ni ler untung nye ade kawan camnih, ade semangat cket aku nak g keje.

Mr. Nestum plak ok je skang neh walaupun masih ade lagih salah faham sane sini. Papepun, masih perlu cuba untuk memahami die. So ekah, ko jangan nak ego mengalahkan ego die plak. Kawan aku cakap, lam hubungan neh, kene SABAR, BERTOLAK ANSUR. Dua elemen nih ler yang aku agak kureng lam diri sendiri. PErlu belajar lagih. insyaAllah.

Jom pegi keje! Keje neh kire yang ketiga la aku wat part time. ahaks! Yeaay ME! :)

- A date with HIM -

Today I wanna go out with him again. AGAIN? yea~ 'cause yesterday I went out with him along with my bestfriend. We ate at some place, I forgot the name~

And today, we will be going to eat sup belut!!! My all time favorite. :)
And after that, he will help me with my scooter. Fix and put something in. Thank God I have my own foreman. :p

Neway, still waiting for his text..............
Can't wait to dive into the sup belut.. :)

The past and The future.

Today I met my precious Mr.Nestum, we ate "Sup Belut" and stuffed our belly with tasty dishes.
It is my last day seeing him, for now. I have to go to KL tomorrow for my convocation ceremony on 1st of OCT 2011 at PICC.
I felt a lift of a joy when I get the chance to meet him. I can feel his warmth and love from his sweet smile. The smile that reminds me how fortunate I am for having him in my life.

I asked his permission to have his ring. The ring which he always wore everyday. I wanna make it as a memorable token for my convo ceremony. And yes, as always, I'm missing him already.
I hope he will stay loyal when I'm gone. I give him my full respect for his patience, loyalty and faithfulness. Yes, I love him so much. :)

Enough said, I'm filling my bag with Baju Kurung. Right~ "Baju Kurung". A convenient wardrobe for a formal ceremony, which I never wore before. I HAVE to wear it on THE day.

That is the feed for 1st of OCT '11, I wanna share with you guys what happened on Mr.Nestum's birthday, he picked me up that day, and brought me to the mall. We walked around hand in hand, window shopping and apparently I cant resist myself when I spotted few nice shirts in PDI store. We bought 5 T-shirts. Two for him and three for me, (of course I got more).

Well, forward to my birthday, we didnt spend much time because we were far apart from each other. But we spoke for 24hrs that day. He always been there for me. Cherished me whenever I'm feeling down. And pull me to be more grounded when I forgot when I'm standing. When we met, exactly on 3rd of Syawal, he picked me up with his black car. And as soon as I'm in the car, making myself comfortable, wearing the sitbelt on, he said, "I came with a friend today". I wondered, there is no other human being in the car except us. I looked at the back sit and I saw this adorable BIG white and creamy teddy bear sitting there. I was like "OMG!!! A teddy bear!!"

And you know how that goes, "oh Hubby, you're so sweet! TQ" etc etc~

That was what happened for the past month. Our birthday. :)

Hari raya this year, we didnt get the chance to dressed up in our maroon outfit. And didnt have the chance to snap some pictures. T__T

But we went to few of our friend's openhouse. We stuffed our belly again (but he just ate a small porpotion of meals and started to smoke ciggarates) as ALWAYS~

I enjoyed staying home with my lovely sister, Amy. I miss her.
And now, I'm starting to shape up my own future. After my convocation ceremony, I hope I can take MUET and apply UPU to further studies in TESL. I know, the field is out of my diploma field. But somehow, I want to chase for what I love and carry on to satisfy my passion in English Literature. InsyaAllah.

Anyway, there will be lots more delay for the next entry. As ALWAYS. :)